tostada
Jordan Turner
 
 
4 cows 1017: ill kill you


ESEA-O S14 - Friday Night Bingo (8-8)
ESEA-O S15 - Ohana Means Family (8-8)
ESEA-O S16 - The Rill Dill (11-5) (1-2)
ESEA-IM S17 - Nothing to Prove/Cafemonster (11-5)(0-2)
ESEA-O S18 - Seendio (15-1) (3-1)
ESEA Open S20 Champion - Ed Head (15-1) (4-0)


UGC Gold HL S12 - Barking Sharks (5-5)
UGC Gold HL S13 - Barking Sharks/FTM (6-3)
UGC Plat HL S14 - The Funkblasters (4-4)
UGC Plat HL S15 - Just Kidding! (4-5)





Currently Offline
Recent Activity
4.2 hrs on record
last played on Apr 29
1,279 hrs on record
last played on Apr 26
15.8 hrs on record
last played on Apr 25
Jim Pork Jun 22, 2023 @ 11:24pm 
ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ raise your dongers
Jim Pork Feb 17, 2023 @ 11:18am 
ill kill you
Jim Pork Apr 22, 2022 @ 10:11pm 
+rep After a good game in csgo, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.
I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, i felt his hard ♥♥♥♥ push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.
chalupa Jan 24, 2018 @ 4:54pm 
1/3 of the wise men
Jim Pork Oct 15, 2017 @ 1:36pm 
I'll tell you what, boys. I'm just about darn tootin' sick of ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥' ants. You ever seen a ♥♥♥♥♥♥' ant? Of course you have, how could you not? They're everywhere. And that's a problem.
When I was but a tiny wee strapping young lad, I was having a jolly time in my yard. That's when I found an ant. Now, I wasn't the brightest child, and my experience with the demon-♥♥♥♥♥ known as ants was at an all-time low. So I actually picked up the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. It immediately sunk it's gigantic pincers into my supple little boy flesh. I screamed like I'd never screamed before. My mother had to come outoutside to get the bastard off my finger.Ants are the bane of my existence. Whenever I want to do something fun, ants get in the way. Maybe it's just me, maybe it's my curse. Maybe you get along fine with and coexist with ants, but not me. When I see an ant I squish that ♥♥♥♥♥♥ with no further thought, because that's what life has conditioned me to do.
Jim Pork May 8, 2017 @ 8:30pm 
Ants. I can't explain it honestly, but ever since I was little I've had this fascination with them. Ants really get my motor running. The thought of thousands of them crawling all over my body and my ♥♥♥♥ just biting the ♥♥♥♥ out of me gives me a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ head rush. Sometimes I like to imagine a world where I can walk outside and just ♥♥♥♥ an anthill and all the little ants start to freak out and attack my invading member, but it's already too late, I'm on all fours and just going at it. Raping their home into a pile of rubble and then drowning their queen in my thick semen.